Underneath it all......

Merry X'mas Eve

While everyone is outside celebrating christmas eve in some sort of way, here I am at my balcony listening to music and watching planes/ships go by with my dog and a cup of juice. It doesn't feel like christmas is here one bit or maybe I'm just a spoiler for festive moods, haha.

Come to think of it, 2014 is gonna come to an end soon…. I wouldn't say that a lot has happened to me throughout this year itself (apart from failed relationships and hopping jobs), but I feel myself growing up I guess. Pfffffffftttttt wtf am I saying, like duh I am growing haha. Leaving school since mid 2013 and coming out to the working world has taught me a few things. Along the way my perspective of things change, being exposed in the aviation industry also taught me how to adapt well in any kind of situation, how scary people can be too hahaha - ok let's just skip that part, my responsibilities - be it at work, or as the oldest daughter in my family, or even a friend, it slowly adds on. I guess I'm quite happy with where I am now, at 22. At the very least, I enjoy what I'm doing and I don't dread going to work (except for the waking up early part). I know my loved ones want the best for me but just sometimes I hate being forced to do things I don't want to do. I think I need to know when to be firm as well and not waiver at the thought of other people's words sometimes. Its really hard for me but I do try.

I can't think of what else to say except that 2014 has been a shitty year for me. I think more shitty than 2013 honestly. So much for 'TO A BETTER YEAR AHEAD!" Okay I should just stop being so blue about life right now and yes on a brighter note, I am grateful for the people who've been there and stayed with me throughout my shitty moments without judging me, haha. Thank you, I love you.

If you admire the rainbow after the rain, why not love again after the pain? 

TGIF, after so long

I usually still have work over the weekends but for this week I can finally say THANK GOD ITS FRIDAAAAY! Managed to end work early today so I came home and packed up my messy messy room and did up a new to-do list. And I can't wait to decorate our christmas tree which just arrived yesterday~ haha. Speaking of X'mas, I'm having a party over at my place with some of my RP mates near end december, we're currently spoilt for choice on a christmas buffet menu. Can't wait till then!

Surprise birthday cake

                                     

                                                 

                                 

Met up with some of my favourite rp babies yesterday for dinner at haidilao and they totally surprised me with a cake for my birthday in advance, how sweet of em! I'm blessed to know these people :> Thanks guys! Love you.

Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran

One of my current fav songs

I came in like a wrecking ball

I don't know what's up with my blog title for this post but yeah my emotions are pretty much screwed at this very moment. I feel wrecked through and through honestly till I don't know what to feel anymore, maybe nothing is good. Wish I could just have one full day to myself (free from work) and just sleep, take a nap, watch shows or do the things I actually enjoy doing without feeling so shit for awhile. I kinda feel like a robot now everyday. But I guess work is the only thing that keeps my mind off things for awhile.... I guess pain is what changes people.

Almost

“The saddest word in the whole wide world is the word almost.

He was almost in love.

She was almost good for him. 

He almost stopped her. 

She almost waited.
He almost lived. 

They almost made it.”

Why hello, September!

Didn't kickstart the month off very well as I fell ill, probably due to overworking myself for the past few weeks.. But nevertheless I'm feeling much better now after taking my meds. I can't help but wonder when I will ever be able to repay my hours finish in time for my Japan trip next month :\ guess I'll have to take it slow first..

I barely worked this week (only on Monday) and I can't wait for the weekends to come already.. Thinking about going to work just tires me, it tires my entire mind. Even when I sleep I do dream of work sometimes, gosh.. Haha.

I'm currently having a baddddd craving for sweet drinks right now but I can't have any cause of my throat, not even cold water!!!!! :< I want bubble tea….. or sugarcane… or maybe some juices :p

Am gonna cuddle and wrap myself up in my blanket now, good night!

100 truths

WHAT WAS YOUR:

1. Last beverage: Plain water :(

2. Last phone call: Alicia

3. Last text message: Sam

4. Last song you listened to: All of the stars - Ed Sheeran

5. Last time you cried: A few days ago

HAVE YOU EVER:

6. Dated someone twice: Like the same person but twice? Uh yes

7. Been cheated on: Yes

8. Kissed someone & regretted it: Yes

9. Lost someone special: Yes

10. Been depressed: If that even counts, then yes

11. Been drunk and threw up: Threw up yes

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLOURS:

12. Pink

13. White

14. Red 

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: (2014)

15. Made a new friend: Yes

16. Fallen in love: Yes

17. Laughed until you cried: Yes

18. Met someone who changed you: Probably

19. Found out who your true friends were: Always knew ;)

20. Found out someone was talking about you: Nope

21. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: Yes

22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Most of them

23. How many kids do you want?: 2?? haha

24. Do you have any pets: Becky, my fat chihuahua :p

25. Do you want to change your name: Nah

26. What did you do for your last birthday: Not much

27. what time did you wake up today: Early afternoon

28. What were you doing at midnight last night: Resting in bed

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for: THE WEEKENDS!!!

30. Last time you saw your mum: Uh...… just 2 wks ago?

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: Nothing

32. What are you listening to right now: Nothing

33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Nope

34. What's getting on your nerves right now: Nothing

35. Most visited webpage: Hmm.. Youtube?

36. Whats your real name: Kelly Ng Li Yin

37. Nicknames: kel, kelly belly, flower girl, sunflower :)

38. Relationship Status: Unavailable?

39. Zodiac sign: Saggitarius

40. Male or female?: Female

41. Primary School?: CHIJ Katong Primary

42. Secondary School?: CHIJ Katong Convent

43. High school/college?: City College & Republic Polytechnic

44. Hair colour: Black and brown

45. Long or short: ?

46. Height: 158cm

47. Do you have a crush on someone?: Love someone?

48: What do you like about yourself? I always appear cheerful to others

49. Piercings: Ears, Navel

50. Tattoos: Nah

51. Righty or lefty: Lefty

FIRSTS :

52. First surgery: Nil

53. First piercing: Ears

54. First best friend: His name was Vincent HAHA

55. First sport you joined: Swimming

56. First vacation: Thailand?

58. First pair of trainers: I don't know

RIGHT NOW

59. Eating: Nothing

60. Drinking: Nothing

61. I'm about to: Check instagram

62. Listening to: Nothing

63. Waiting on: the world to change hahaha ok no.

YOUR FUTURE :

64. Want kids?: Yes

65. Get Married?: Yes

66. Career?: Be my own boss :)

67. Lips or eyes: Eyes

68. Hugs or kisses: Both

69. Shorter or taller: Taller

70. Older or Younger: Younger

71. Romantic or spontaneous: Romantic

72. Nice stomach or nice arms: Any hahaha

73. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive?

74. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship

75. Trouble maker or hesitant: Neither

HAVE YOU EVER :

76. Kissed a stranger: In a dare game, super awkward

77. Drank hard liquor: A LIL bit

78. Lost glasses/contacts: Nope

79. Sex on first date: No

80. Broken someone's heart: Yes

82. Been arrested: No

83. Turned someone down: Yes

84. Cried when someone died: No one died yet

85. Fallen for a friend?: Yea

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

86. Yourself: Sometimes

87. Miracles: Not really

88. Love at first sight: Maybe

89. Heaven: Not sure

90. Santa Claus: No

91. Kiss on the first date: Yea

92. Angels: Not sure

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time?: No

95. Did you sing today?: All the time

96. Ever cheated on somebody? No

97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go?: Back to when I was preparing for my O's

98. If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be?: Nil

99. Are you afraid of falling in love?: Yes..

Quote of the night

“It isn’t possible to love and part. You will wish that it was. You can transmute love, ignore it, muddle it, but you can never pull it out of you. I know by experience that the poets are right: love is eternal.”

Avril Lavigne - My Happy Ending

Can't even remember when was the last time I came back to my own blog and write an entry. Not very long ago I'd say but the consistency is totally not there at all, oops…
Been really busy working my ass off, keeping myself occupied and not waste my day(s) away.. So far work has been good to me, my bosses have been really kind and understanding towards me, and I really appreciate all that they've done and taught me for these past 3 months. Never would I imagine myself to be picking a retail job over flying. Many of my relatives or friends go like, 'WHAT, WHYYYYYY~??? Travelling around is so much better and much more fun! WHY YOU'D QUIT!???" and yes, majority would think that I've made a damn foolish decision to leave flying but well, I'm not regretting any of it. Travel? I can leave anytime!

Been feeling really lousy to the max these past few days….. And being the fool that I am, drowning myself in sad songs even more instead of facing the facts and moving on. It feels like I'm sucked into this dark stage where I cannot get out. Sometimes I can't help but feel that I'm really crazy. It really hurts so much when you give someone your all, you stick with em no matter what. Then one day they just give up on you and won't even fight for you. The one thing you would never have done to them, they could do it with no hesitation. What's worst is…. you can't do shit even if you wanted to. They don't want you back, they just give up.

How do you look at the one you love and tell yourself its time to walk away? :'<

Songkran 2014

I celebrated Songkran in Singapore (@ Golden mile a.k.a the miniature land of the Thais) this year with my mum as none of us could spare time to go back to Thailand and I actually enjoyed it cause in Thailand, its much more wild and sometimes dangerous for us girls especially, haha.

And if you're wondering what Songkran festival is all about, its actually one of Thailand's most famous & well known festival which is an important day marked on the Buddhist calendar to celebrate the beginning of the Thai new year. And it gets really wet and dirty when water and powder/sand are being involved! But hey, that's kind of the fun part haha. The best part is, anyone can join in! Not just the locals or Thai people.

Water is being used and thrown around on passer-bys to symbolise getting rid or washing away of whatever bad luck they may have and powder being smeared on one another for good luck and be blessed for whatever good things ahead :)

If you wanna stay clean and dry, don't come to Thailand during the first few days of the Songkran festival period as you'd definitely be aimed. To simply put it, NO ONE WILL GIVE CHANCE!!! Hahaha

Here's some photos I took when my hands were still clean and dry!

Wed B'fast

Had breakfast this morning at ONE MAN COFFEE which is located @ 215R Thomson Road S574349.

It was my first time there and I really enjoyed what I had ordered and sakura tea (I love tea). Though I only had a piece of bread, don't underestimate it cause its really yummy with runny egg and cheese inside and its texture is just perfect.

I forgot what's it called on the menu though but it also comes with bacon jam at the side which really tastes like our Singapore BA GUA! The whole combination of it is definitely a *thumbs up*

I would love to go back there and try out their other food and pastries available. Not forgetting their coffee ;)

Till then, have a good day! :>

Sunday night

Its 10:05 PM now and I'm FREEEE from work, spending some alone time now and munching on some 4-pc sushi I got from ntuc while doing grocery shopping with my family just now - p.s. I did have my dinner. My blog's dead, always dead even though I say I'll revive it but NOPE it does not happen, haha. Since I'm free now and using my lappy, I thought why not just post something and make it come alive again (period) :p

I've been in and out of Singapore lately like almost consecutively every day, and people ask me if I feel homesick or miss my country and etc…. Sad to say that my answer to them is NO. The only ones I'd be missing or miss is my family and loved ones. Other than that sadly, I don't miss anything else about Singapore. Not the food, not the people, not our transports here and definitely not the weather. I guess flying to different countries and staying there made me realise and see so many different cultures, people, and experiences altogether. And the only thing I'm looking forward to right now here in singapore is moving to my new home, that's all. I need a change, I want a change. And maybe trying out a new part-time job or something like working in a cafe or some small shop, I'd totally give the place a hella' good service. Even small things like greetings and compliments, who doesn't like receiving them? Well it makes my day when someone greets me anytime happily and giving good service. Something which majority of the Singaporeans lack. When I was in Australia, their service was tip top and the people there are so helpful and smiley all the time. Then when I came back to sg, its like ugh I'm back here with all these gloomy earthlings :\ There's just so much more outside of Singapore and I'm glad to have experience a bit of the outside world.

Flying aside, I have been rather cautious of what I put on my face lately. Till the point where I've stopped putting anything at all. And surprisingly its getting better. I couldn't tell if the products I used were just bad for my face or I'm just stressed and shit, or still going through puberty and etc - thus the sudden breakouts. I used to apply toner and moisturiser every day and night, scrub my face with some facial scrub twice a week, I really tried taking care of my skin but it got worst apparently :\ so I left it alone for about 2 weeks now, only using facial foam to wash my face every day and amazingly, my face got better. But am left with pimple scars now which I hope would fade away soon enough cause my face looks so bad with so many scars I FEEL UGLAAYYYY :'< haha. Wish I could just take an eraser and just rub it off or something. My face has never been so bad till now, in my 21 years of existence. Never. And I regret not taking care of my face well in the past, especially when I used makeup and never washed my face or removed my makeup with anything but WATER. I took my good skin for granted and tadahhhhh this is my face now with so many breakouts and scars. So girls who use makeup, make sure you really clean your face properly and maintain your skincare routine and for girls who don't use makeup, try not to start putting so much makeup cause really, its no doubt bad for your skin, haha. What ever happened to the Kelly who loved make up? Haha.

Okay I'm sleepy now, will end off the post here with some recent pictures I took in gold coast :>

First post of 2014

Happy new year everyone! Hope you guys had a great kickstart to your new year's,  unlike mine :\

But trying to keep it as positive still, doesn't mean the rest of my year would be like crap nor stop me from doing what I want to do. I shall learn to love and appreciate each and every day that I have from now on, to cherish the loved ones around me, to be a stronger person altogether, and not be such a lazy ass person anymore and do the things I love without hesitating or worrying so much all the time and just go for it. In 2014, I just want to live simply and be happy. That's all I wish for..

Can't wait for CNY and also my upcoming trip to Japan next week! :)